Kill Your Friends
by joryuukage
Summary: He was never going to play truth or dare with Kuwabara and Yusuke EVER again--not that his mom would LET him. (One-shot)


He was going to _kill _his friends.

"ID." The bouncer of the club said gruffly.

Sighing, he showed the bouncer his ID before proceeding inside.

"OK all you Dudes and dudets!" The DJ said in a surfer voice. "Naha! It's open mike night! And you know what that means! Go ahead and sign yourself right up!"

Kurama shook his head.

"OK! Cha! First up is a guy-Cha! Guess he was to embarrassed to put his real name! First up is-and we only have his alias folks! And boy is he cocky!- The Great Sex God Yoko Kurama!"

Kurama shook his head again before heading up the steps to the stage.

"DUDE!" The DJ shouted. "I thought you were a guy!"

"I am," Kurama said exasperated.

"Wait, don't I know you?"

"No, no you don't." Kurama said pointedly.

"Yeah, I think I do. Wait! You go to my school, don't you? Dude! You're that nerd! Shuichi Minamino! Didn't figure you as a 'Sex God.'"

"Shut up and give me the mike!" Kurama growled out.

"Jeez, dude! Don't have to bite my head off…must be perpetual PMS."

"SHUT UP AND GIVE ME THE MIKE BEFORE I FEED YOU TO MY PLANTS!"

"…Plants?"

Fed up, Kurama grabbed the mike out of his hands and jabbed the 'Play' button for his song.

"_Baby, let's get together" _He sang, quite nicely.

_  
"Honey hush, me and you  
And do the things  
Ah, do the things  
That we like to do  
Oh..."_

It took a moment for the crowd to realize what song he was singing, but when they did, they cheered.

"_Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight  
Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight_

"_Ba-by  
I'll meet you  
Same place, same time  
Where we get  
We get together  
And please our mind (?)  
Oh..._

"_Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight  
Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight_

"_Baby... oww..._

"_Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight  
Do a little dance, make a little love  
Get down tonight, get down tonight_

"_Baby..._

"_Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo  
Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo_

"_Now now now..._

"_Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo  
Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo  
Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo_

"_Let's do it right_

"_Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo  
Get down, get down, get down, get down  
Get down tonight, baby  
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo"_

And then, as promised, he added his own line to the end of the song.

"_ALL NIGHT!"_

The crowed cheered.

"OK!" The DJ said. "You know the dri-"

"SHUICHI MINAMINO!"

Kurama paled. "M-Mother!"

Mrs. Minamino stormed up to the stage and dragged her son off it.

"Hey, kiddo," Someone said from next to him. He turned his head and saw Shizuru.

"I'm going to _kill_ your brother!" Kurama hissed loudly at her.

"Be my guest," Shizuru said.

"Shuichi, I can't believe you just did that! Do you have no honor?"

"I wasn't about to back down from a dare."

"I mean, really, 'Great Sex God?'"

"Hiei's idea," Kurama explained quickly to Shiziru.

"So your pride is more important to you than the honor of this family?"

"Really, where did it come from? Your not _that_ good."

"Shuichi! Out of wedlock!"

"I didn't do anything, Mother!"

"Didn't do anything? I'm hurt!"

"You're not helping!"

"Whoever said I was trying to help?"

"I don't believe this, Shuichi!"

"Good, because its not true!"

"Not true? Don't just sit there and lie to your mother like that!"

"Shizuru, I'm a virgin!"

"In _this_ body, maybe!"

"You're still not helping!"

"That's it young man, when we get home, you're grounded." Mrs. Minamino started pulling him out of the club.

Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Hiei snickered from their place on the curb as Kurama was shoved in the backseat of his mother's car.

He flicked them off and mouthed 'F-ck you!', fogging up the window.

His friends laughed harder.

That's it.

He was going to _kill_ his friends.

He was going too make sure they died a **_slow_** and **_painful_** death.


End file.
